Just got a call from Tristan today. He's away at college for those of you that don't know. He's my oldest, and the first to leave the nest, so to speak. It's been almost an entire school year since he left. I'm adjusting, but it's been tough. I'm finally at a point that I don't want to cry every time I hear his voice or even think of him, but again, it's tough. The last couple of calls from him have eluded to him not coming home for the summer. There's a little stabbing pain in my heart every time I think about it.

I knew he had to go to school. I knew he would be leaving for the school year, but really never thought about him not coming home for the summer. It never crossed my mind. Of course he's coming home, is what my brain tells me. Don't be ridiculous! He can't possibly live there all year long. Can he?

Well, it certainly is looking more and more likely that he won't be coming home for the summer. "I've got a social life here now. I've got a job," he tells me. What I hear is, "I've got a life without you now." I know this isn't the case. I mean, he at least still calls, right? So, he hasn't moved on completely, but man oh man. I miss him.

Of course I would never stand in his way. And I would never make him feel bad for his decisions. We all knew someday he'd grow up and move away. That's what kids do. They grow up and move away to live their own lives. It just caught me by surprise is all. I guess the saying is true. They do grow up so fast.

As parents, we should be proud that they are grown, and able to take care of themselves(hopefully), but that pride conflicts with sorrow. It's never easy.