Wishing For Old Times

Tristan's birthday came and went yesterday. His 19th birthday.

It's hard to believe he could be 19. I mean, it was just recently that I held him in my arms and changed his diaper, wasn't it?

Time sure flies.....

I spent the day remembering. He wasn't here to remember with me. He was at school. In another state. I went through some of his old things. You know the stuff if you're a mom. Old baby clothes with spit-up stains on the front. Favorite toys. Monogrammed baby gifts received from special family and friends. It was a bittersweet day, torn between missing the old days and being proud of who he's become.

Talking to him did little to ease my longing, as all he talked about was adult things that he's doing now and will be doing in the future. I would so love for him to need his mommy just a little bit again.