That's Why We Have Kids

"I need a new bosch dishwasher," I told Mike the other afternoon.

"No you don't," he answered matter of factly.

"Yes, I do," I insisted.

"I thought that's what we had kids for?" was his reply.

"No, we had kids so we wouldn't have to carry the heavy bags of groceries. And to let the dogs outside to go potty. And to dust and vacuum the house. Oh, and to mow the grass and rake leaves," I rattled off. "I need a dishwasher. When the children do dishes, they claim the dishes are clean, but there's always crusty gunk on them. I've told them time and time again how to do dishes correctly, but they never learn. I think they do it on purpose so I'll just do them myself. They may not look it, but they can be quite crafty when they want to be," I told him.

"I need a dishwasher. My hands are all cracked and dry from being in the soapy water. No amount of lotion is going to save these babies." I thrust my hands in front of his face, and wiggled my fingers for good measure.

He just raised his eyebrows and went back to his computer.

"Well?" I asked.

"Well, what?"

"Am I getting a dishwasher or not?" I was starting to lose my patience.

"Oh, you were serious?" he asked.

"Never mind. I don't have time to do this. I have dishes to do."