Deer!

It was a close one, let me tell you. Even I could see the whites of his (her?) eyes (do deer even have whites?). It happened so fast, it's all a blur now. All I know is, I never want to see a live deer that close to my car again.

We were traveling along, minding our own business after a nice outing to Walmart, which is my favorite store, by the way. We had just turned on our road and Mike and I were gabbing about something or other, when all of a sudden, I spot a maniac deer with a death wish running full speed at our car! Mike, who was driving and should have seen the crazy beast, kept right on driving as if impending doom was not a concern.

I started yelling, "Oooh! Oooh!" with my hands in the air, unable to get the word "deer" out of my mouth. Mike looked at me like I had lost my mind. Innocent bystanders would have thought I was auditioning for the role of Arnold Horshack in "Welcome Back Kotter."

The closer the deer got to our car, the louder my "oohs" became and the faster my hands waved back and forth as if they had a mind of their own.

Finally, Mike saw the deer and swerved, sending us all into the passenger side of the car.....hard. My shoulder still hurts from being smashed up against the window. I think Tim hit his head on his window.

Luckily, the act of swerving the car in a Dukes-of-Hazzard-type fashion gave the deer enough time to change his course of direction and make it behind the car safely, but only by a white hair or two of his tail. He ran quickly to the other side of the road and off through the field to live another day.

After we got home, I apologized for not being able to warn him about the deer sooner. Mike informed me that had I yelled "deer!", he would have slammed on the brakes and it would have ran right into the side of the car for sure.

As it turns out, I was a hero without meaning to be. I single-handedly saved our car, and probably everyone in it from sure disaster.

How about that?