Me and Horses Don't Agree

Guess I won't be needing a pair of riding boots anytime soon.

That's right. This One-Ton-Tessie ain't ridin' no mo' horses for a long time. Once was enough for me.

Picture a short, round woman on top of a large horse. It's not pretty. And the poor horse! He had to be hurting once I got off. He'll probably need at least 3 days to recoup. I felt so bad for the poor thing.

I felt like a big lump of jelly atop that horse, let me tell you. He'd move, and I'd jiggle.

Walk, walk, jiggle, jiggle. I felt like I should be holding my boobs and my fat down as we went along. I asked if there was any way to make him walk more smoothly, but alas, horses don't know how to walk smoothly. At least this one didn't.